I need you to understand something. I wrote this for you. I wrote this for you and only you. Everyone else who reads it, doesn’t get it. They may think they get it, but they don’t. This is the sign you’ve been looking for.
You were meant to read these words.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
The Mirror Hurts
I never heard what you said, just what you meant. I hate you. I love you. I don't love you anymore.
You've said some of the worst things that anyone has ever said to me. And meant them, too. But guess what? I love you immensely; intensely, still. Due in part to the fact that you've definitively said the most wonderful things too. And meant them. And how could the mirror not hurt? The mirror reveals the reality of what is a painful history now and forevermore...
I don't believe you when you say such things. I can't. Or I won't. Because I know that love does not vanish in an instant. These days, I know only that I am madly in love with you. If you could look into my eyes right now you would be able to see that. I'll wait for as long as it takes to prove it. And I will love you for eternity. With or without your permission.
True love doesn't end. But the realization that you weren't validated by someone incapable of seeing your true greatness can be hard on the heart. Love yourself. Laugh at the limit of her vision.
Your tweets today are magnificent, my friend. I've said it before, but thank you, truly, for bringing out the best in those who read and feel your words.
All the thoughts that spin in my head than have never been put down into text. Thank you random person, you have made me decide what to do about something that has been driving me insane. Now to get the courage to actually go up and say the words to her. She is also my ex so that makes it a little more difficult.....
I'm straddling all three emotions like the borders of countries. I want to be at "I love you", but I'll be alone. "I hate you" is only a mask, a veil over my true feelings. "I don't love you anymore"- that's somewhere between my present loss and future liberation, blocked by memories and hopes and unrequited pleas. Why did you come into my life? Why'd you have to leave? Will you ever enter again? Three more warring countries; three more borders I straddle. My brain is ready to make the intelligent choice. My heart urges me to make that four hour drive to rejection.
Ouch..this hits home. My boyfriend and I just broke up a few days ago. He told me that he still loved me, but that he just couldn't do it anymore. But he told another person that being married to me would be a "life sentence".
It's what I've needed to say to him all this time. Thank you.
ReplyDeletethis blog is brilliant. you are brilliant. thank you for writing.
ReplyDeleteYou've said some of the worst things that anyone has ever said to me. And meant them, too. But guess what? I love you immensely; intensely, still. Due in part to the fact that you've definitively said the most wonderful things too. And meant them. And how could the mirror not hurt? The mirror reveals the reality of what is a painful history now and forevermore...
ReplyDeleteI don't believe you when you say such things. I can't. Or I won't. Because I know that love does not vanish in an instant. These days, I know only that I am madly in love with you. If you could look into my eyes right now you would be able to see that. I'll wait for as long as it takes to prove it. And I will love you for eternity. With or without your permission.
P.S. I mean that. And you know it too.
XO
I'd love to hear what people mean instead of the things they say. I always hear what they say. Especially if it's what I want to hear.
ReplyDeletei'm still at i hate you. i love you.
ReplyDeleteit doesn't feel good. at all.
True love doesn't end. But the realization that you weren't validated by someone incapable of seeing your true greatness can be hard on the heart. Love yourself. Laugh at the limit of her vision.
ReplyDeleteThis is me.
ReplyDeleteI'm choosing to believe the words sandwiched by negatives... the best part says "I Love You."
ReplyDeleteThat is what you meant, right?
Your tweets today are magnificent, my friend. I've said it before, but thank you, truly, for bringing out the best in those who read and feel your words.
ReplyDeletex
ff
There's nothing in this world so sweet as love. And next to love the sweetest thing is hate. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
ReplyDeleteBecause you should be reminded more often, you're beautiful <3
ReplyDeleteAll the thoughts that spin in my head than have never been put down into text. Thank you random person, you have made me decide what to do about something that has been driving me insane. Now to get the courage to actually go up and say the words to her. She is also my ex so that makes it a little more difficult.....
ReplyDeleteI'm straddling all three emotions like
ReplyDeletethe borders of countries.
I want
to be at "I love you", but I'll be alone.
"I hate you"
is only a mask, a veil
over my true feelings.
"I don't love you anymore"-
that's somewhere between
my present loss and
future liberation,
blocked by memories
and hopes
and unrequited pleas.
Why did you come into my life?
Why'd you have to leave?
Will you ever enter again?
Three more warring countries;
three more borders I straddle.
My brain is ready
to make the intelligent choice.
My heart urges me to make
that four hour drive to rejection.
my boyfriend just left me yesterday... i really feel like dying. can someone help me how to get over this?
ReplyDeletepls help me... my boyfriend just left me yesterday...im tired of crying i really cant get over him..
ReplyDeletei still love him.
Ouch..this hits home. My boyfriend and I just broke up a few days ago. He told me that he still loved me, but that he just couldn't do it anymore.
ReplyDeleteBut he told another person that being married to me would be a "life sentence".
I've never felt so alone.