I need you to understand something. I wrote this for you. I wrote this for you and only you. Everyone else who reads it, doesn’t get it. They may think they get it, but they don’t. This is the sign you’ve been looking for.
You were meant to read these words.
Monday, October 25, 2010
The Joys Of Agoraphobia
This place is in my head and no matter where I run, it's always here, all around me. It's a big room and my voice echoes when I yell, and there are days when I think you couldn't make it to the other side if you tried.
This means a lot to me, being an agoraphobic.Honestly, there are just so few people who get how I feel. I wish this didn't take so much from me.I wish it didn't hold me back from living my life to the fullest.
Like a large mountain in the distance, I hike and hike to get to it's other-side. Its size stays the same, never getting any bigger as I trudge forward. I know it's there, I know I can reach it. I'll keep moving...
Amazing blog, I've been following it for a while now. I find your words inspirational, and always fitting to what I feel or have felt. Thank you for sharing, and congratulations for such wonderful work! cheers.
And nowhere for the anger or the frustration or the fear to go despite the size. It's horrible, but knowing someone else gets it at least reminds me it's not just me.
At least, thank goodness it's a big room and not a small room inside your head. Anyone else have those dreams of being smothered by a big white blanket or puff ball, or of everything suddenly seeming like a tiny speck a great distance away, when they were little? ...is it just me, or are there more anonymous posters these days?
Interesting! For me the echos are always there, sometimes they have a fast rhythm, sometimes they are loud, and some times I can detach myself-just a little-from them and let them do their things :)
Throw caution to the wind, tell our story to the world. What a funny story it is indeed. I've started writing music again (never quit), want me to write you a song?
Okay, it goes like this...
"I've made us wait too long, I was wrong wrong wrong.
It is you waiting on me, not the other way around. I'll sit patiently until I see you again. I don't mean to sound so cocky/abrasive, but these things have a way of throwing my head into circles. Up and down, loopty loop.
If you were really alone there would be no reason to be afraid. I've done everything I can think of. Let's put our heads (and hearts) together for the time being and find a way to compromise. Love you so. Are you waiting for me to jump first? I thought I was waiting for you. Almost finished with what? I'm hopelessly confused, yet oddly still delighted with anticipation. Can I borrow your lips?
Ah. The perfect words for today. Don't know how you do it, Iain.
ReplyDeleteThis means a lot to me, being an agoraphobic.Honestly, there are just so few people who get how I feel.
ReplyDeleteI wish this didn't take so much from me.I wish it didn't hold me back from living my life to the fullest.
You really can read my mind...I know how you feel... Love.
ReplyDeleteyou live inside a little room in my hands[which doesn't sound very romantic but it is]
ReplyDeleteLike a large mountain in the distance, I hike and hike to get to it's other-side. Its size stays the same, never getting any bigger as I trudge forward. I know it's there, I know I can reach it. I'll keep moving...
ReplyDeleteAmazing blog, I've been following it for a while now. I find your words inspirational, and always fitting to what I feel or have felt. Thank you for sharing, and congratulations for such wonderful work! cheers.
ReplyDeleteare you an agoraphobic yourself?
ReplyDeleteA couple of things I want to do myself... wait for me, okay? Love.
ReplyDeleteAnd nowhere for the anger or the frustration or the fear to go despite the size. It's horrible, but knowing someone else gets it at least reminds me it's not just me.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand... you just described what I pretty much feel all the time.
ReplyDeleteThank you for this, I needed it.
ReplyDeleteAt least, thank goodness it's a big room and not a small room inside your head. Anyone else have those dreams of being smothered by a big white blanket or puff ball, or of everything suddenly seeming like a tiny speck a great distance away, when they were little?
ReplyDelete...is it just me, or are there more anonymous posters these days?
And if..Just if..Only if..Just a maybe..Despite of all..Because ... Love
ReplyDeleteThis is exactly how I feel. Thanks for wording it precisely.
ReplyDeleteInteresting!
ReplyDeleteFor me the echos are always there, sometimes they have a fast rhythm, sometimes they are loud, and some times I can detach myself-just a little-from them and let them do their things :)
Throw caution to the wind, tell our story to the world. What a funny story it is indeed. I've started writing music again (never quit), want me to write you a song?
ReplyDeleteOkay, it goes like this...
"I've made us wait too long, I was wrong wrong wrong.
Do dah, la da fa."
etc. etc.
#1 hit!
It IS romantic that I live in a small room on your hand...I love my small room :) sometimes hard to breathe though :(
ReplyDeleteAnd where is it that I can see you at my choosing? I choose right here right now. Too selfish?
ReplyDeleteLet me see you, the door is wide open. We have a lot of ground to cover, or maybe none at all.
This is me saying "Hello"
Some days it feels so crowded in my head and other days I could choreograph a whole dance for you, but I'm happy here.
ReplyDeleteYou read my mind.
ReplyDeleteIt is you waiting on me, not the other way around. I'll sit patiently until I see you again. I don't mean to sound so cocky/abrasive, but these things have a way of throwing my head into circles. Up and down, loopty loop.
ReplyDeleteI'll wait a lifetime for you, or even two.
Best wishes my love.
I am at one of those McDnoald's, on my way to studies, it provides free wi-fi for its custmors...XOXO <3 smiles...
ReplyDeleteI am so happy to be here too...to be with you...Love <3
ReplyDeleteIf you were really alone there would be no reason to be afraid. I've done everything I can think of. Let's put our heads (and hearts) together for the time being and find a way to compromise. Love you so. Are you waiting for me to jump first? I thought I was waiting for you. Almost finished with what? I'm hopelessly confused, yet oddly still delighted with anticipation. Can I borrow your lips?
ReplyDeleteI'm trying as hard as I can. Stop holding me back.
ReplyDeletewhere do you run to escape from yourself?
ReplyDelete