I need you to understand something. I wrote this for you. I wrote this for you and only you. Everyone else who reads it, doesn’t get it. They may think they get it, but they don’t. This is the sign you’ve been looking for.
You were meant to read these words.
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
The Dark Words You Walk Down At Night
This is why it hurts the way it hurts.
You have too many words in your head. There are too many ways to describe the way you feel. You will never have the luxury of a dull ache.
You must suffer through the intricacy of feeling too much.
This just captured my feeling right now. The consequence of hiding your lifelong feelings. You didn't even notice that it already hurts. Waiting.. for no reason. :/
But at least you walk down yours. Because this night time goes on and on and I'm alone in a poem that never stops flowing, a river of words, drowning in Knowing. It never quite ends does it?
I think it's probably different though, for you, when there are others fishing at your shores? Easier and more difficult, changing with the season.
Every time I come to read a new post, it's as if we'd stayed up all night the night before talking ... you just know what's written all over my heart and soul.
If it's there, even if it's damaged, you'll find a middle ground. Sometimes you gotta put your pride aside and try. It's up to you this time around though. I'm done searching.
I know. A surge of emotion went through me: relief. I needed to feel that too much, for far too long. It only validated another feeling I was trying to ignore.
I like this ground.
It's a pool lounger and I'm lounging; no longer waiting. There's no need for a middle ground. Take the middle out and you have a lifesaver; this is my life and it's not to be saved for later. By anyone.
Though this hurts the worst, maybe that means it's the best kind of hurt
ReplyDeleteThat would be way too much. Your writing resonates with me because it's as if I wrote it...
ReplyDeleteThank you. This is exactly why I feel how I feel right now.
ReplyDeletethe words manifest into dreams that do nothing but try their very best to kill me slowly, painfully..
ReplyDeletethere are a million ways to hurt and all of them turn into different scenarios late at night.
Hey...I was linked through a post from Tumblr..I just wanted to stop by and say the post was beautiful. I really, really loved it.
ReplyDeleteThis just captured my feeling right now. The consequence of hiding your lifelong feelings. You didn't even notice that it already hurts. Waiting.. for no reason. :/
ReplyDeleteHeartbreaking </3
Oh, no, you're surely mistaken. There is always a choice.
ReplyDeleteAnd the hurt that hurts the most, is the dull ache of choosing to instead feel the silence of nothing at all.
There is no luxury in a nameless hollow brand of ache. (We promised not to be ghosts)
But at least you walk down yours. Because this night time goes on and on and I'm alone in a poem that never stops flowing, a river of words, drowning in Knowing. It never quite ends does it?
ReplyDeleteI think it's probably different though, for you, when there are others fishing at your shores? Easier and more difficult, changing with the season.
Love.
ReplyDeleteI wish I couldn't feel at all
ReplyDeleteGreat Thinking!
ReplyDeleteWords just never fail :)
I feel sad, how can these words change?
ReplyDeleteEvery time I come to read a new post, it's as if we'd stayed up all night the night before talking ... you just know what's written all over my heart and soul.
ReplyDeleteGreat work :-)
ReplyDeleteThere is a old latin proverb saying "Acta Non Verba". That helps to bring order over chaos.
"Amor ordinem nescit." -Saint Jerome
ReplyDelete"Animadvertistine, ubicumque stes, fumum recta in faciem ferri?" -me to you
So what do I do?
ReplyDeleteOnce you know you can never go back.
ReplyDeleteThere's no middle ground?
Its doesnt seem to be fair but then again i have to think, it could be worse.
ReplyDeleteIf it's there, even if it's damaged, you'll find a middle ground. Sometimes you gotta put your pride aside and try. It's up to you this time around though. I'm done searching.
I know. A surge of emotion went through me: relief. I needed to feel that too much, for far too long. It only validated another feeling I was trying to ignore.
ReplyDeleteI like this ground.
It's a pool lounger and I'm lounging; no longer waiting. There's no need for a middle ground. Take the middle out and you have a lifesaver; this is my life and it's not to be saved for later. By anyone.
I can't thank you enough, really. Take care.