I need you to understand something. I wrote this for you. I wrote this for you and only you. Everyone else who reads it, doesn’t get it. They may think they get it, but they don’t. This is the sign you’ve been looking for.
You were meant to read these words.
Monday, April 13, 2009
The Error Of Parallax
The only reason I hate you now is because I loved you then.
"There is not a thin line between love and hate. There is --- in fact --- a Great Wall of China with armed sentries posted every 20 feet between love and hate." -Gregory House, HOUSE M.D.
I don't want to (pretend to) hate you but i'll do anything to stop myself from loving you. But i'm finding out that's impossible to do. I'll just try to be happy for you.
your indifference is killing me. It wouldn't hurt if you bothered to be at least nice to me. I have never hurt you but you do it all the time lately. And I know you don't mean it.I know you're good because I truly loved you and still you hurt me in a million ways.
he had a million ways to hurt me but his indifference cut to the core... then later i realized i gave him too much power to hurt me but i could have that power back and i took it.
Except that even when I SAY I hate you and even when I truly FEEL the hate, I know deep down inside that you and I are just people who found each other and had to deal with life. I cannot hate you for that, it is impossible. We both tried and sometimes we're still trying.
I can't hate you. Our love was not a romantic love, for that dies when the romance dies. We may live seperate lives, with different people. Please know i will always love you.
I never hated you, though I was blindingly angry with you for a time.
I'm not angry with you any longer, though you were judgemental and cruel in ways which were crystalline in their ingenuity (I can't even imagine how you've treated actual lovers).
Because of that, I no longer wish I could spend any more time with you. I no longer think you're a terribly kind person (at least, you were rather terribly unkind to me).
But. I still love you, and I will, always. Not in spite of all of that, and not because of it. But just because I love you. You are wrong, you know -- love is not "only a two-way street, otherwise it isn't love." Because I'm all alone here on this infinite one-way street. And I know what I feel.
i only care enough about one person to hate him. Indifference is much more effective.. I wish so much that I could be indifferent to him. When you want someone so much you'll never forget.
I can't stand listening to this music when I type this. I am not typing, I am shouting at you! But the rules of conduct and playing the game means I can't do that. I can't even say anything. In a last effort to save some face I can't even sms. I which I could take some of them back.
You've made a fool of me, just as I am sure you've done many times before with many girls. Undeserving! I replay it in my mind and I can't understand why? I suppose this is a frequently asked question but it's not one I am used to asking.
Am I not enough? I tell myself and those who ask that I don't want to be anything but friends. That there was never anything more, it was always just this. But I lie, because there was something more, the possibility.
I check my mail constantly. I know I shouldn't and I feel even more defeated with every empty inbox. You do nothing. You don;t do anything anymore. I don't understand? We would fit, you and I. If you didn't do what you do, I would be enough. But because of this world and you in it, I am not enough. I don't understand.
The more I think about everything. Try to convince myself that I hate you, and remember all the things you did - I cant help but love you more because I realise that they were reasons I fell in love with you in the first place.
The only reason I hate you now is because I loved you then.
when love and hate collide
ReplyDeleteSigned.
ReplyDeleteYeah the worst is when they don't hate you back, they just don't care...
ReplyDeleteI second thelittlefriend.
ReplyDeleteWorst of all, i love you and no matter how much you hurt me, i can't make myself hate u.
ReplyDeleteI can't really hate you. No matter what you do and how much you hurt me, I still feel the urge to protect you.
ReplyDeleteeverything written by everyone so far is so real and true.
ReplyDeletethis is true.
ReplyDelete"When she says "I hate you" she loves you. Or she did once, anywayv_
ReplyDeletevery well put
ReplyDeleteI can never hate you, just what you've done
ReplyDelete"There is not a thin line between love and hate. There is --- in fact --- a Great Wall of China with armed sentries posted every 20 feet between love and hate." -Gregory House, HOUSE M.D.
ReplyDeleteI pretend to hate you. Maybe then I'll stop loving you.
ReplyDeleteI don't want to (pretend to) hate you but i'll do anything to stop myself from loving you. But i'm finding out that's impossible to do. I'll just try to be happy for you.
ReplyDeleteThelittlefriend..
ReplyDeleteI'm that kind of "ex" who naturally becomes indifferent through time.
Never forget that I loved you more than you could have ever imagined. Words, even actions, were insufficient to show you my love for you.
I'm sorry things turned out to be this way.
your indifference is killing me. It wouldn't hurt if you bothered to be at least nice to me. I have never hurt you but you do it all the time lately. And I know you don't mean it.I know you're good because I truly loved you and still you hurt me in a million ways.
ReplyDeletePls forgive me for my mistakes.. I.m sorry pls come back I still love. Will be happy together pls .. come back n don't go ... pls don't go na. Pls
Deletethis is so true, especially when he doesn't seem to care anymore, when he doesn't need me or my love
ReplyDeletehe had a million ways to hurt me but his indifference cut to the core... then later i realized i gave him too much power to hurt me but i could have that power back and i took it.
ReplyDeleteExcept that even when I SAY I hate you and even when I truly FEEL the hate, I know deep down inside that you and I are just people who found each other and had to deal with life. I cannot hate you for that, it is impossible. We both tried and sometimes we're still trying.
ReplyDeleteI can't hate you. Our love was not a romantic love, for that dies when the romance dies. We may live seperate lives, with different people. Please know i will always love you.
ReplyDeleteYou can never truely hate another until you've truely loved them. Without love how could anyone know what hate really is?
ReplyDeleteI never hated you, though I was blindingly angry with you for a time.
ReplyDeleteI'm not angry with you any longer, though you were judgemental and cruel in ways which were crystalline in their ingenuity (I can't even imagine how you've treated actual lovers).
Because of that, I no longer wish I could spend any more time with you. I no longer think you're a terribly kind person (at least, you were rather terribly unkind to me).
But. I still love you, and I will, always. Not in spite of all of that, and not because of it. But just because I love you. You are wrong, you know -- love is not "only a two-way street, otherwise it isn't love." Because I'm all alone here on this infinite one-way street. And I know what I feel.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteYou still love me.
ReplyDeleteHatred is an emotion and if there was no hate then there would be no chance for love.
But this can never be.
metatron
Thank you, Miss B, for your comment above. It means so, so much to me.
ReplyDeleteGod bless dear. And Iain, you too.
I knew it!
ReplyDeletei only care enough about one person to hate him. Indifference is much more effective.. I wish so much that I could be indifferent to him. When you want someone so much you'll never forget.
ReplyDeleteI can't stand listening to this music when I type this. I am not typing, I am shouting at you! But the rules of conduct and playing the game means I can't do that. I can't even say anything. In a last effort to save some face I can't even sms. I which I could take some of them back.
ReplyDeleteYou've made a fool of me, just as I am sure you've done many times before with many girls. Undeserving! I replay it in my mind and I can't understand why? I suppose this is a frequently asked question but it's not one I am used to asking.
Am I not enough? I tell myself and those who ask that I don't want to be anything but friends. That there was never anything more, it was always just this. But I lie, because there was something more, the possibility.
I check my mail constantly. I know I shouldn't and I feel even more defeated with every empty inbox. You do nothing. You don;t do anything anymore. I don't understand? We would fit, you and I. If you didn't do what you do, I would be enough. But because of this world and you in it, I am not enough. I don't understand.
when you cant deferintiate between love and hate.
ReplyDeleteI was looking for this.
ReplyDeletei gawked for a moment just now.
ReplyDeleteThe more I think about everything. Try to convince myself that I hate you, and remember all the things you did - I cant help but love you more because I realise that they were reasons I fell in love with you in the first place.
ReplyDeleteGod. I hate the fact that this is true.
ReplyDeleteBut, to be honest, I still love you.
And I hate the fact that I do.
true.
ReplyDeleteI love you �� �� �� �� �� �� �� �� �� �� �� �� ❤
ReplyDelete