Monday, June 6, 2011

The Parts Apart

I know you don't want it to matter right now. That's why it matters the most.


Anonymous said...

once again <3

F said...

you echo something deep inside me. its almost frightening.

PeaceLoveandSharpies said...

You're so amazing.
I wish you knew I existed...

Her soul said...

So. There is this guy. And we used to be together for four years, but then we broke up for the stupidest reason ever and ever since, I've been missing him. Not that superficial, though. I didn't know until I recently got in touch with him again, via a friend of us. Now we're talking on WhatsApp. I don't know if he likes me, though. I don't even know if I like HIM. I guess I just still love him. But I don't want it to matter right now. I just want to talk to him. And that's why it matters the most...

Anonymous said...

You're right, I've been trying so hard to convince myself that my feelings for you shouldn't matter. That it was a silly crush. But I miss you and not just your being; I miss your laugh and your smile and your mind. I miss your passion and your timidness. I miss our awkward silences that made me comfortable. What matters the most is you.

Anonymous said...

Please, don't hurt me again...just be honest and up hurts much less than finding out you were lied to.


Danielle said...

You will always exist,at least in my mind. My heart is hurt, but I understand.
I've stopped hating you- and that's when I've stopped crying.

Anonymous said...

I swear these posts just smack me right in the face about how dead on they are.


Really, thank you.

Anonymous said...

I want to badly for it all to be over. I want it to be over and to enjoy this fresh, happy, dream-of-a-beginnging I was blessed with... But I can't. It's not over, and unfortunately it has only begun. There's still so much to think about and deal with. So much forgivness to be given. My heart needs to mend. My thoughts need to be rationalized. I wish I could tell him... Would he understand? Or will his sheltered mind shun me. Worse yet, will be disregard by trauma and belittle me... But don't I want my trauma to be disregarded? I want this all to be over.

Anonymous said...

I can't let it matter to me. It wouldn't be good for either of us.

Anonymous said...

I can't let it matter to me. It wouldn't be good for either of us.

Rachel Dare said...

And each day I come crawling to this world you've created, this guide to how every situation needs to be faced, and I pick apart your words until they fit the empty holes left in me. And sometimes you're the only thing that keeps me together. Sometimes you're the only thing that matters.

Unknown said...

Here's to hoping that in the end, the parts would want to be whole again.

Anonymous said...

How am I to be for you,
if I am not whole for myself?

Putting the pieces back together. Never, never give up, my Heart.


Anonymous said...

I hate you so,
I love you.
You make me ill,
I love you.

Gorden said...

i came up with this. use it or a version of it if youd like: patterns are part of nature, i guess its not fair for me to expect you to be different, but no matter how many times i tell myself this, i find myself hoping that you are

Anonymous said...

I do still miss you and you know that but i have nothing to do but letting you go to set my heart free, good bye my angel.


Whatever said...

And the things that I most want to say, are the hardest. They stick in my throat, waiting for the right moment.
I hope it comes today, I hope at least you know I Love you.

Anonymous said...

You will never know, even I don't ... but everything should & shouldn't matter in it's own way.

Anonymous said...

Happy birthday fellow south african comrade!!

Anonymous said...

But... Why does it have to matter? It's tearing me apart.

forever1111 said...

I dont know..I wish everyday that I could be in your life..that we could have one life together...but thats all done..It doesnt matter to you...but you will always matter to me..thank you..11 is not my lucky number..but two together..thats just my always..this guy

Anonymous said...

I am here, but I am with you always. I am thinking about escape everyday and I tell myself "maybe tomorrow" everyday. I worry too much, The kids, the car, the airport, the house, the lights, broadway street....what if you ain't there? I am scared that what will happen if I see you. Whats your reaction if you see me? Surprised in good way or bad way? What would you say? What would you do? I had my bag in the trunck last time, I should have taken it out.

Anonymous said...

You are not this guy.
You are not my Henry.
You are not 11:11.
You are my Everything.

I left you a silent letter
in our secret place
Read it now, and know

I am not complacent with a life lived apart from your world
I am not content with wishing on stars for you each night
I am not settling for a life that is a little less than amazing
I will not rest until I find myself reposed in your arms,
nose nestled in the crook of your neck
But you know well enough that wishing stars & 11:11 & mountains of hope only carry your feet so far,
until your feet must find the strength to walk on their own
I am placing one foot in front of the other
I am unfolding my wings
I am carving a path for myself,
and I am walking straight for you

I love you.
More than you know.


n said...

you are this other part of mine
but you are so far
miss you

Guiding Spirit said...

Every time I think I have moved on, I am reminded that I haven't.

Anonymous said...

does it satisfy your arrogance to know that i still miss you? after all that hurt and pain you brought to my heart ,you wanna my heart to admit that it`s only you in it, that`s not fair .sorry even if my heart calls you day and night, i wont show you my thrown dignity under your feet

Anonymous said...

You were just a rich girl, only having fun.

080905 said...

I miss you but you want me to set you free. It matters coz it will make you happy.

NsNz said...

i know you don't want me to know about your leukimia.
i know you only wanted me to smile.
i know you don't want me to think of you.
that's why i found out,
that's why i cry.
that's why i can't spend a night without thinking and praying for you.
you think it didn't matter if i didn't know but it is. it matters so much.
do you know? you're all that i got.

Anonymous said...

You know I love you, right? Well, I really do. And it's been so hard for me just to sit back and watch my friend be loved by you, even though he didn't appreciate you at all, didn't treat you for what you were worth. He just acted like you were another of his friends, and I know that he was leaving, but I could also see how your heart was breaking because he was leaving to Australia and he would hardly even talk to you, even on his last day there. It's a lot like the Adam Lambert song, actually, "if I had you". That makes sense, really, because I'm gay and I know that if I had you my life would be the most amazing thing ever, because I'd have this beautiful, amazing, gorgeous girl who loves me back and can feel how much I love her. That's probably the hardest thing about being gay, though, seeing the person you love having their heart broken, and not being able to glue it back together because so many people would never think of you in the same way again if they found out. So you just have to shut up and watch. I know that you probably won't be able to love me back, because if you're straight, you can't change it- just like I can't change being gay. But just to let you know how amazing and special you are and to let you see the warmth in my heart would be phenominally amazing for me. But I can't, because I never know how anybody would react if they knew I were gay. Maybe when I'm older, tougher, and more independent, I'll let the world know, but for now I suppose this will have to do, an anonymous post on a blog which I wish you'd find but probably won't. For me, I guess you could say that you're both the best, and the worst part of being gay, and that I love you but have no choice but to just get over you.

Me said...

Stay strong Anonymous. Unfortunately, we still live in a world that judges us for who or how we love but that world is changing with every generation that passes through it.

Hopefully this will be the last generation that ever has to be afraid of what people will think of them, because of who or how they love.

You have mine (love),


Anonymous said...

i think now
i just want you
to know who i am
and what i've become
purely out of selfish self indulgent reasons
because i don't even remember you
at all
and you've changed.
so have i
but you probably don't notice
but i think that we can be friends
once more.
i think i'd want that.
but i'm too proud. too scared.

i'm so so so so sorry. i'm just so sorry,

Arra Karim said...

I dont knw what im feeling right now.but i know i will miss you if i dont text you.why do i fall so easily for you?i dont even know you that well but theres something about you that really touches my heart.i love how you make me smile and laugh, how you upset me yet i stil want you.i will feel miserable if i dont talk to i wish you knew how deeply i am falling for you...*sigh*