Thursday, January 10, 2013

The Nerve Endings Shatter Like Glass

It doesn't hurt because if you keep hurting the same part of you again and again and again, the nerve endings all die. And when that happens, that part of you goes numb. That's why it doesn't hurt. Don't be proud of it.

24 comments:

nhzr said...

And I thought I got stronger.

Iris said...

It’s a fact of life that people will take advantage of you, look you straight in the eye and lie to you, and won’t think twice about hurting you if there’s something in it for them they want badly enough at that moment.

You’re not only supposed to accept it, but also expect it.

The paradox is, the earlier in life you understand this, the better off you are…but the older you are that life finds you still hoping otherwise, and the greater the number of people that life finds still hoping otherwise, the better this world would be.

A said...

I agree. Being numb may let go of the pain, but it's not the finish line. Pain is needed so people will fight to end it, or so we thought. But the goal, really, is contentment. Apparently, when you started to feel numb, the pain starts to win. You won't let it happen, will you?

Anonymous said...

I also thought I'd grown stronger

JK said...

I refuse to think about it. I delete it. I change the station. I close my eyes. I turn my cheek. I block it out. I never press send. I walk away. I cuss. I drive away.

If you only witnessed the nights this heart should have been humanely numbed maybe you'd trust that I really loved you.


FeverDream said...

i kept saying it, over and over and over again: keep treating me that way, eventually i won't respond anymore. he thought that he would wear me out, break me down, make me into the exact kind of well-mannered, self-serving girlfriend he wanted. i told him it wouldn't work and i would only end up more wild. now look at me, i feel nothing! i don't even wince when he screams in my face and insists that i'm useless.

look what you've done.. are you happy yet?

Anonymous said...

Well I lived through the pain, didn't I? Over and over until the scars formed and the nerves died and there wasn't anymore reason to try. But I am proud to be alive.

After all of it, there's no shame in numb. Your body and soul will do what it must to survive.(There's only so much pain we can take). And I survived... no one can take that from me.

So yes, I am proud. Proud to be numb. Proud to be breathing.

Unknown said...

I'm not proud knowing the feeling entirely too well.

j.k. said...

Colder and colder.

Trusting less and less.

Building stronger and higher.

Sweet and there, now manipulative and unpredictable.


Everything I said I would tell you later.

Arundhati said...

It doesn't hurt because you keep hurting the same part of you again and again.

I had my heart skip a beat while reading it.

Kudos!

CN said...

You have numbed me.

Chris said...

Thats what every second of every minute of every damn day i waited for you did to me. It tapped and tapped and tapped my feelings for you until they grew numb and now i no longer wonder.

Anonymous said...

Sensitivity is intelligence <3
you feel way too much the good, way too much the bad .... you are ALIVE ;)

Dizzles said...

What nobody tells you is that numbness is far worse than any pain before it.

Anonymous said...

You would think after continious abuse a person would be used to thhe pain. But each time hurts as much as the last, the only difference being the trama from the impact no longer pushes you off track. That doesn't mean you have to be the immovable object facing the unstopable force, because we are only human. If you keep taking the hit you will eventually be wounded.

The Dreamer said...

Let me feel the pain, because then I'll know it's worth fixing. I'll know that I need to forcibly remove you from my nerves.
Don't ever sit there, leeching away my ability to feel. Don't let me grow complacent to the bastards.
Let me know I need to push them the fuck away.

Alejandra said...

I was never proud of being numb, never proud of being cold but I didn't know how to be different, as a matter of fact I couldn't change and know that made it much worse.

Bunnie said...

like a limb when removed, the mind will tell you it is there. even if numb, the mind will tell you it is still there. it is never truly gone. be proud of your mind and its adaptability.

Bunnie said...

like a limb when removed, the mind will tell you it is there. even if numb, the mind will tell you it is still there. it is never truly gone. be proud of your mind and its adaptability.

Unknown said...

That's what's happening to people who give so much love yet receives much pain from the other.

Anonymous said...

I agree.. I myself been through that pain. I can say I moved on, I guess a little bit.. because are days I feel so down and I wanted to cry so much. I feel the pain everytime I remember all the things that he did to me. I feel hatred, remorse and wished he could feel what I'm feeling. It hurts like hell when you have given so much effort for the relationship and yet the person you love doesn't really give a damn. The pain he caused me is way beyond imaginable. I felt betrayed, if he would've put a knife through me I wouldn't feel the pain at all. I don't understand why he had to make me fall then leave when I already have fallen deeper.

I should've known from the start that he would just break my heart...

To that person: Thank you for this pain, thank you for insulting me, for stomping my heart, for breaking your promises, for making my heart bleed, thank you.. U hurt me beyond expression, and I will never understand why YOU MARRIED ME at all...

Miranda said...

My wrists are numb. I am not proud of it. Not at all.

Anonymous said...

I have gone numb and couldnt describe the freedom of it all, its so light as opposed to constantly being hit with waves of harsh realization. Maybe we should be proud, that our bodies clicked the switch FOR us, i personally wouldnt be alive if i hadnt gone numb.

m.l said...

Pain makes you do things you thought you would never be able to do. These things will either fix you or tear you apart.