You're at the top of my list of meaningful decisions I need to make.
Friday, March 13, 2009
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I need you to understand something. I wrote this for you. I wrote this for you and only you. Everyone else who reads it, doesn’t get it. They may think they get it, but they don’t. This is the sign you’ve been looking for. You were meant to read these words.
The Story Behind Everything
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March
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17 comments:
you were....now you just represent it~
I didn't want to decide, one way or another. When you were on the list, it was easier to pretend that either option was equally possible. But it doesn't look like I'll be saying "I love you, too" just because I've always said it. I think it's time I go back to only saying things I mean.
I made my decision, and sometimes I regret it. Only at weak points though.
Like Chop Logik, I wanted to pretend, I really did. But I didn't mean it when I said "I love you" back, and I hate myself for that...
Yep, the very first one!
I've realized and I've decided.
You're not The One.
Sorry to my heart, who hoped so voraciously and blindly for years.
I don't know if I deserve you though.
Just give me time enough time. I'll be leaving soon, and then I'd be able to tell you.
Trust me, this is for your own sake.
Soon.
He made his decision.
Your selfish indecisiveness hurt me so much. Too much. You made me brought, brought me to a happiness I never knew.
& now I'm falling. Falling into pieces cause everything you said, did wasn't cause of love.
But responsibility.
& I doubt I was on top of your list cause you took too long.
Once you feel it grab hold, you can never go back.
Once you feel it pinch, once you feel it bite, once you feel it latch, once you feel it sting, Its stinging.
No matter what I decide, nothing will bring me out of this mess. Because it won't be you like it was before the Summer, or was that you in the Fall and the Winter too? I can't sit here and scramble through your head. I can't decide what a person would do, although I know it's up to me. I don't know how to weigh the things he's done and the way I feel, and the way this is all going to make me feel.
I do have to think about those things, don't I? It's already far too late to protect myself from being hurt, but can I protect myself from being destroyed? Losing the only thing I have? Me.
It feels like a neverending ache.
Even though, one day in the future it might start to ache a little less, I remember.
My memory endures forever.
Sometimes NOT making a decision, is a decision in itself.
Err...
I THINK I'm indecisive..
but I'm not sure...
Wow! Being on some-one's list is so cool!
Even when they dont know what to do with you...
I made my choice. You made yours.
But before you take me off your list, I should tell you, my choice was you.
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